Do We Really Have Control Over Our Weight?

Can a 45-year-old man who stands 5’8” and weighs 350 pounds simply decide to lose half his body weight?

He may decide — but can he succeed? And what does success even mean in this context?

These aren’t just medical or psychological questions — they’re deeply human ones. They ask us to examine questions of free will, biology, and the boundaries of personal agency.

Let’s make it real. Picture this man. He’s middle-aged, worn down by years of struggling with his weight, perhaps juggling work stress, family obligations, and creeping health problems. One day, he says to himself, “Enough. I want to change.” Is that enough? Is making the choice enough?

Choice Within Constraints

To explore this, consider breathing.

Breathing is a biological necessity — but it’s also something we can influence. We can slow it, deepen it, speed it up. We can train ourselves to breathe differently in moments of stress or during exercise. And we can choose what kind of air we breathe — clean, polluted, or smoke-filled.

Eating is no different. We must eat and, like breathing, eating is driven by strong biological impulses. But we also shape how we eat — when, where, what, and how much.

The concept of weight regulation includes many factors. Genetics influence metabolism, energy levels, and even our tendencies around food and activity. Environment shapes availability, habits, and social norms.

And yet, within that complex web, there is still room for choice. For self-awareness. For self-regulation — the ability to observe our behaviors, set goals, and adjust over time.

Self-Awareness as the Starting Point

Our hypothetical gentleman can, through growing awareness of his body, mind, and surroundings, begin to shift his course. Not through an overnight transformation, but through small, intentional actions:

 

• • Choosing to walk after dinner instead of watching TV

• • Swapping sugary drinks for water

• Reaching out for support instead of withdrawing into isolation

 

These acts may seem minor, but over time, they can reshape physiology, habits, and identity.

He may never look like a fitness model — and he doesn’t need to. But he can become healthier, more confident, more energized. He can feel good about himself again.

So, Do We Have a Choice?

Yes — within limits. Our choices are shaped by forces we didn’t choose: biology, upbringing, circumstances. But within that landscape, choice does exist.

We can cultivate it. We can strengthen it. We can make use of it.

And change begins there — with a decision, a commitment, and a belief that improvement is possible.

–Stephen Stotland, Ph.D.

LET’S CONNECT

If this approach resonates with you, I’d be happy to talk.